"The Donkey Raffle"

My bro sent me this email and I laughed out loud before shakin' my head at the ending.

Please excuse the ALL CAPS. I've edited out the >>s, but figure that's enough effort for such a silly and simple post.
THE DONKEY RAFFLE

A YOUNG HILLBILLY NAMED KENNY, MOVED TO TEXAS AND BOUGHT A DONKEY FROM A FARMER FOR $100.00. THE FARMER AGREED TO DELIVER THE DONKEY THE NEXT DAY.

THE NEXT DAY THE FARMER DROVE UP AND SAID, "SORRY SON, BUT I HAVE SOME BAD NEWS, THE DONKEY DIED."

KENNY REPLIED, "WELL, THEN, JUST GIVE ME MY MONEY BACK."

THE FARMER SAID, "CAN'T DO THAT. I WENT AND SPENT IT ALREADY."

KENNY SAID, "OK, THEN, JUST BRING ME THE DEAD DONKEY."

THE FARMER ASKED, "WHAT YA GONNA DO WITH HIM?"

KENNY SAID, "I'M GOING TO RAFFLE HIM OFF."

THE FARMER SAID, "YOU CAN'T RAFFLE OFF A DEAD DONKEY!"

KENNY SAID, "SURE I CAN. WATCH ME. I JUST WON'T TELL ANYBODY HE IS DEAD."

A MONTH LATER, THE FARMER MET UP WITH KENNY AND ASKED, "WHAT HAPPENED WITH THAT DEAD DONKEY?"

KENNY SAID, "I RAFFLED HIM OFF. I SOLD 500 TICKETS AT TWO DOLLARS A PIECE AND MADE A PROFIT OF $998.00."

THE FARMER SAID, "DIDN'T ANYONE COMPLAIN?"

KENNY SAID, "JUST THE GUY WHO WON. SO I GAVE HIM HIS TWO DOLLARS BACK."

KENNY EVENTUALLY BECAME THE CHAIRMAN OF ENRON
Ba-dump crash!

Comments

  1. You got me there... I was expecting the donkey to be involved in a resurrection or at least some strange post-modernist nativity scene...

    (I don't know what a post modernist is. Someone did try to explain it to me in a comment once, but I still don't get it.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Post-Modernist is like Historical-Revisionist: Code for "I don't know what I'm talkin' 'bout, but you don't either, so I think that you'll think that I sound like I do."

    I thought that before I learned what it's supposed to mean, and reading/talkin' to people who use it "seriously" has confirmed this.

    er, not that there's anything particularly wrong with that. {-;

    (Yer on a roll, D! Keep 'em coming, bro. lol!)

    ReplyDelete
  3. funny funny funny...even to somebody like me who actually was an Enron stockholder.

    ReplyDelete

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