Make hard CA$H from home while the world is in flames!

[Link] Are you an animal lover; and also an atheist, agnostic, jew, muslim, or other non-Christian? If so, you might qualify for the JesusPets Partner Program!

JesusPets will pay YOU to take care of dogs, cats, and other pets. To qualify, you must agree with this statement:

The JesusPets Partner Program Statement

  • I love animals, and am willing to care for pets after the Christian Rapture.
  • I am not, and never have been a born-again Christian.
  • I believe it is immoral to have sex with animals, and have no desire to do so.
  • I believe it is immoral to consume common domesticated pets (note: this includes goldfish!), and have no desire to do so.

If you agree with, then please contact JesusPets to join our international community of JesusPets Partners!

Thank you Tonya! LMAO!!! Oh thank you soooo much!!! Now my life can have some real meaning!

And imagine the RATES we can charge!



  1. What's scary is that there are idiot fundaMENTALists out there who would fall for this. Probably the ones who have bumper stickers on their cars that say "Warning, In case of rapture, this car will be unmanned."

  2. I just want to know how soon I can start gettin' paid. You know, Jesus is comin' and "we know not the hour" so if I was goin' on the Jesus train I'd be gettin' my sitter quick.

    Show me the money!

  3. Yeppers Stardust. Those bumper stickers are part of what motivated me to buy meself a shiny new Evolve Fish for this past Xmas.

    And I don't know Tonya. I had an appointment with Satan today to try and figure a way outta my Eternal Lease on Hell's 4th Level. {shakin'head} Dude sure is a hoot though!

    But he says he's got a deal with Jessie not to let slip the date of the Rapture. If he reneges, which he confided he's just dying to do, he's gotta let Ayn Rand go to Heaven.

    I told him I can commiserate quite warmly with his predicament, but the sly SOB is still holdin' me to the lease unless I can find a way to convert the Dalai Llama to Christianity. {sigh}


  4. omfg Michael - you slay me! this is hysterical!


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